Last Night in New York (718)

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• (718): View more from New York

  he told me my vagina needed a tic tac

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• (718): View more from New York

  I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.

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• (718): View more from New York

  you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...

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• (718): View more from New York

  He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.

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• (718): View more from New York

  Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.

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• (718): View more from New York

  Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.

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• (718): View more from New York

  My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.

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• (718): View more from New York

  We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.

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• (646): View more from New York

  its my first week of college and i have a UTI

  (718): View more from New York

  not easy being a whore now is it

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• (718): View more from New York

  you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"

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• (718): View more from New York

  you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"

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• (718): View more from New York

  i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.

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• (718): View more from New York

  you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.

  (917): View more from New York City

  i told you we never speak of that again

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• (718): View more from New York

  One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"

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