Last Night in Tennessee (901)

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.

  (1-901): View more from Tennessee

  explains the nose bleeds.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?

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