Last Night in Oklahoma (405)

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.

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  I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.

  (1-405): View more from Oklahoma

  i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  His hands were made for my vagina.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  how was ur day?

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.

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