Last Night in New York (607)

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• (607): View more from New York

  Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.

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• (607): View more from New York

  You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me

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• (607): View more from New York

  haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.

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• (315): View more from New York

  he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out

  (607): View more from New York

  what a beautiful fairy tale

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• (607): View more from New York

  I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.

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• (607): View more from New York

  My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.

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• (607): View more from New York

  I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.

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• (607): View more from New York

  he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him

  (313): View more from Michigan

  at least he gets points for a creative booty call

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• (607): View more from New York

  Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.

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• (607): View more from New York

  I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name

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• (607): View more from New York

  you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later

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• (607): View more from New York

  The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.

  (607): View more from New York

  Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.

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• (607): View more from New York

  If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.

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