Texts From Last Night · LoneWolf54's Favorites

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LoneWolf54's Favorites Texts:

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(219): View more from Indiana

Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.

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(847): View more from Illinois

Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"

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(530): View more from California

I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.

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(707): View more from California

The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends

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(815): View more from Illinois

I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs

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(480): View more from Arizona

He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out

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(443): View more from Maryland

you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.

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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.

(1-913): View more from Kansas

So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.

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