Texts From Last Night · beerb4noon's Favorites

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beerb4noon's Favorites Texts:

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(417): View more from Missouri

I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.

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(317): View more from Indiana

Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.

(614): View more from Ohio

Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money

Fav 27 7192 1868
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?

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(513): View more from Ohio

Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.

(1-513): View more from Ohio

Not having phil's child is good enough.

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(317): View more from Indiana

she was licking his armpits.

(317): View more from Indiana

asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.

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(314): View more from Missouri

Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.

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(207): View more from Maine

i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship

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(812): View more from Indiana

My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.

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