Texts From Last Night · butterfingers37's Favorites

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butterfingers37's Favorites Texts:

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(812): View more from Indiana

How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?

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(905): View more from Toronto

dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends

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(509): View more from Washington

I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.

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(239): View more from Florida

So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.

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(805): View more from California

found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.

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(812): View more from Indiana

Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.

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(906): View more from Michigan

i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?

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