Texts From Last Night · kiki95's Favorites

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kiki95's Favorites Texts:

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level

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(240): View more from Maryland

and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.

Fav 12 3430 1266
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(559): View more from California

I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper

Fav 21 5502 2035
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(203): View more from Connecticut

you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'

(508): View more from Massachusetts

what was i wearing?

(203): View more from Connecticut

nothing

Fav 22 15629 1739
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(631): View more from New York

Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?

Fav 29 5484 1997
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.

Fav 8 2417 990
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(602): View more from Arizona

Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.

Fav 34 1996 4929
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(425): View more from Washington

Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.

Fav 19 1638 5853
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