Texts From Last Night · tennisbunny's Favorites

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tennisbunny's Favorites Texts:

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(818): View more from California

You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.

Fav 2 1060 532
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(443): View more from Maryland

You pole danced in your parka.

Fav 4 883 533
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.

Fav 11 1276 618
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(208): View more from Idaho

Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.

Fav 10 1446 685
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(732): View more from New Jersey

Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.

Fav 17 5044 1379
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.

(1-304): View more from West Virginia

Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?

(304): View more from West Virginia

No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.

Fav 15 6986 1442
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(502): View more from Kentucky

Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!

Fav 7 3656 1259
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