Last Night in Virginia (540)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

ADVERTISEMENT

• (540): View more from Virginia

  that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic

  Fav 2 876 560

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"

  Fav 5 955 555

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (540): View more from Virginia

  I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.

  Fav 3 802 544

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs

  Fav 1 406 539

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina

  Fav 2 1280 539

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.

  Fav 1 648 536

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (540): View more from Virginia

  Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding

  Fav 1 517 533

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.

  Fav 2 806 532

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality

  Fav 6 1143 532

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal

  Fav 1 746 531

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.

  Fav 1 963 528

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (540): View more from Virginia

  There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.

  Fav 1 1108 525

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.

  Fav 2 743 505

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.

  (1-540): View more from Virginia

  I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.

  Fav 7 823 501

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT