Last Night in Utah (801)

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes

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• (801): View more from Utah

  The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts

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• (801): View more from Utah

  As long as you're not dating white guys again.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?

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• (801): View more from Utah

  I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses

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• (801): View more from Utah

  we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious

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• (801): View more from Utah

  that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now

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• (801): View more from Utah

  You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.

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