Last Night in Florida (352)

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• (352): View more from Florida

  Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!

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• (352): View more from Florida

  Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes

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  I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish

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• (352): View more from Florida

  All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."

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• (352): View more from Florida

  I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..

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• (352): View more from Florida

  there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode

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• (352): View more from Florida

  I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"

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• (352): View more from Florida

  I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  I just got invited to go home with a married couple...

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• (352): View more from Florida

  Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much

  (352): View more from Florida

  Like they're going to fly away?

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