Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (630)

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Last Night in Illinois (630)

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(630): View more from Illinois

So this is what bad decisions tastes like...

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(630): View more from Illinois

My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?

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(630): View more from Illinois

well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room

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(630): View more from Illinois

He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"

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(630): View more from Illinois

i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls

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(630): View more from Illinois

I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?

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