i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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