oh god the rape fog is back!
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
