Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
