I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
