You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
its not stalking. its research.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
