Umm I'm too high to move.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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