It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
