We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
