He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Barsexuality is the new black.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize