very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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