he puts the penis in happiness.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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