is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
