covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
