Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
