i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
