That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
