Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
