turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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