There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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