ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
