There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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