Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
vagina is talking i cant
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
whose ass print is on the piano?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
