I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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