yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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