In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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