I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
