GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
