im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Well I just put wine in my tea
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
