Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
