U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
we should paint friendship bongs
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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