But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
