I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize