then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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