Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
