just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
so let's talk penis.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize