man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Randomize
