who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
