There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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