Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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