Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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