we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
